Between Mom and Jo

Megan Tingley Books
Little, Brown and Company
ISBN 10: 0-316-06710-5
ISBN 13: 978-0-316-06710-2

Ages 12 and up



 

 

When I first started writing, I had no idea it’d be ten loooong years before I’d make enough money to exceed the poverty level. To pay my fair share of living expenses, I took a part-time job in a school working with special-needs kids. They weren’t physically or intellectually challenged; most were falling behind because of absences, learning styles differences, dysfunctional families, or emotional burdens children should never be forced to bear. (Define “Normal was inspired by the strength and resiliency of these amazing kids, but that’s another story.)

 

One day I was in the teacher’s lounge eavesdropping on a group of teachers. Parent-teacher conferences were coming up and one teacher said, “I made these special certificates for any of the fathers who come. What if both of Nick’s moms come?”

 

Another teacher said, “I know. I was going to teach a family unit and now, with Nick in my class, I can’t.”

 

Why not? I wondered. For years this simmering anger grew in my gut. Why can’t you teach a family unit because one of your students has lesbian parents? What if a kid had bi-racial parents? Would that be okay? Would a single-parent family be acceptable? What about a blended family, or a kid who lives with relatives or in foster care? Are those families ones you could validate as a “family unit”?

 

Twelve years and that snatch of conversation never left me. To get it out of my head, and to explore my feelings about alternative families, I knew I’d have to write a story. One story became many stories and their interleaving became the book, Between Mom and Jo.

 

The challenge of writing queer literature for mainstream audiences is two-fold: First, finding the universal truths that any reader can relate to (our commonalities), and second, embracing our extraordinary differences. Not special—out of the ordinary. A child of gay parents has unique issues to deal with—in his family, extended family, at school, in a society where he’ll be called upon to defend his parents at some point in time. Overcoming misunderstanding, oppression and bigotry give our stories a particular depth. I always consider sharing our stories an opportunity to expand a reader’s knowledge of the range of human experience.

 

In Between Mom and Jo I wanted to answer these questions: Is the bond between a boy and his mother different from the one he forms with a father? If it is (and I believed it was) what would happen if a boy with two mothers, whom he loves equally, is put in the position of having to choose between them?

 

To feel Nick’s love for each of his mothers and experience how the three of them function as a family, I wanted readers to grow up with Nick. When I began, all I had were random vignettes—Nick with Erin, his biological mom, Nick with Jo, his heart mom, Nick with Mom and Jo, Nick at school, Nick at home. One day this vision of a watermelon seed taped to a sheet of scrapbook paper provided the flash of inspiration I needed to pull the book together. The intricate structure is somewhat experimental, since it requires readers to empathize with a three-year-old Nick in the beginning, and to stay with him until the end of his journey at age 14. But I always trust young adult readers to explode all the myths about their reading habits.

 

Between Mom and Jo earned me my first ever Lambda Literary Award (yay). I’d love if it you’d give this book a read and drop me a note to let me know if Nick should be allowed to have any more pets. (You’ll have to read the book to get that joke J.)

 

©

Julie

 

 

 

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